Friendship Green Flags: How to Spot the People Who Get You

When it comes to friendships, we all crave connections that feel safe, uplifting, and true. But how can you tell if the people around you genuinely get you, or if they’re just passing through your life for a season?

Understanding the green flags in friendships — those signs that show someone truly has your back — can make all the difference.

We can really argue if people who were bad friends to us are just bad people, or if they simply don't share our set of values and therefore don't truly value us.

Or maybe, it's about not knowing how to establish healthy boundaries or protect ourselves. Regardless, we live and learn, right?

As we grow, we come to better understand what we value most in friendships and what resonates with us. So, what kind of traits do we look for in people to be a part of our circle?

Here are arguably some of the best green flags to look for in a friend.

Signs of True Friendship: Green Flags to Look For

Here are some real-life friendship green flags to help you identify the people who genuinely get you and want to be there for you:

1. They Care About You, Even When You are at Your Lowest

A friendship based on true loyalty means your friend will stand by you, even if it’s not the most “beneficial” for their image. Whether it’s supporting you in a difficult time or standing up for you. They’re concerned with being there for you.

2. They Cheer for Your Wins — Loudly

Besides than being there when you need, a true friend celebrates your success without jealousy or competition.

Whether it’s landing a dream job or reaching a personal goal, they’re the first to shout your accomplishments from the rooftops.

3. They Give You Space but Still Reach Out

Real friends understand that life can get busy. Even if months go by without a catch-up, they won’t let the distance affect the connection. Instead, they take the time to check in and ask how you’re doing. They know it’s not about constant communication, but about making sure you still feel valued, no matter the time gap.

4. They Don’t Let Drama or Gossip Come Between You

True friendship is about loyalty. Someone who respects your bond won’t allow petty drama, gossip, or misunderstandings to come between you. If an issue arises, they’ll address it with you directly, and they’ll never let others interfere with your relationship.

5. They Give You the Hard Truth, Even When It’s Uncomfortable

A real friend won’t sugarcoat things just to avoid hurting your feelings.

They’ll tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear. This kind of honesty may sting in the moment, but it comes from a place of love and respect, helping you grow and avoid making harmful mistakes.

6. They Keep Your Secrets Safe

Vulnerability is a huge part of any close relationship, and a true friend will protect your secrets with utmost care. When you share your deepest thoughts, worries, or personal stories, you can trust that they’ll hold that information with integrity — and never use it against you.

7. They’re There When You’re Struggling — and When You’re Winning

A great friend shows up not just when you’re at your lowest, but also when you’re at your best. They’re cheering you on when you’re succeeding, not just when you need support during hard times. It’s the small gestures — like sending a congratulatory message when you’ve achieved something big — that remind you they care.

8. They Help You Avoid Self-Sabotage
   

Sometimes, we can all be our own worst enemies. A true friend doesn’t let you self-destruct. They’ll call you out when you're about to make a decision that could harm you, even if it’s uncomfortable. Their goal is to help you avoid unnecessary mistakes and to push you toward becoming the best version of yourself.

How to Spot True Friendship: The People Who Get You

In a world where friendships can sometimes feel transactional or surface-level, it’s crucial to identify the people who truly understand you.

True friends don’t just accept your quirks; they celebrate them.

They see your potential and support your growth — even when it’s hard.

Some of the most powerful green flags come in moments when they don’t have to be there but choose to be. They’re the ones who listen, show up, and keep your trust intact no matter what.

In a world full of distractions and shallow connections, these are the people who deserve your time and energy.

Do you recognize any of these friendship green flags in your relationships? If you’re lucky enough to have friends who show up for you in these ways, hold onto them tightly. And if you’ve found yourself struggling with toxic or shallow connections, now might be the time to reevaluate who deserves your trust and energy. At The Brunch Table, every brunch is an opportunity for connection!

Would you share the biggest green friendship flag you have ever witness? We would love to know! If you prefer to share it privately, feel free to reach out at hello@thebrunch.app